Just logged in and apparently my last post was in June 2010 so 4.5 years on I guess my story has changed a lot.
Still have pcos (now there's a shocker bet you didn't guess that) still overweight (after having a few years a few stone lighter) and still childless.
Now the reason for the exit- I guess I used to post as me and partner were ttc, alas the best thing in the world happened to me- I found him in bed with someone else (skinnier, younger, prettier... But with the moral compass of a toad - and that's a de service to toads!) I left our half built home within an hour... Realised that our relationship was deal along time ago and I had kind of just became a shadow of myself in the relationship and wasn't who I was anymore.
I got back on my feet, had a wild year with single friends and got my second degree and then met a man that makes me more happier than I have ever been.
I'm going along happy and was ok with being childless, having lots of fun and feeling that it would be such a lifestyle changer having a child that I started to look at the negatives of a parenthood that I never understood when some of my friends used to shy away from parenthood would say a few years ago. Today a colleague and friend told me she was pregnant (everyone has been pregnant in my office over last couple of years and usually I am genuinely fine and happy for them) but for some reason (I'm working from home) I burst into tears after. I think it's because we always used to be the two who shied from holding baby's in the office saying "we don't do small baby's" wouldn't hold them etc and now she has a baby in her tummy and I'm left empty. I feel so guilty for having those thoughts and of course I am happy for her. It I guess my emotions took me by surprise. This is especially as this doesn't usually happen at all- I have a large group of 9 friends whom I have grow I up with since primary and are very close with and all but one has family's now- one is even pregnant with her 5th child and not once have I had these feelings. I also work as a child's social worker and have worked in child protection removing children and also in adoption and again even when faced with really unfair situations have never had these feelings.
Maybe I feel lie I'm getting old and my time is running out...
Sorry to rant rather than introduce myself xxx