To a better year.. 2013!!!

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To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Sazwell » Wed Dec 26, 2012 8:59 pm

I just want to say to all the lovely ladies on here that I hope next year is a better year for all of us who have suffered a loss.. I hope we all get our sticky bfp's and 2013 is all our years!!!!

Love and baby dust to all

HAPPY NEW YEAR xxxxx

(bit early but just wanted to tell everyone) xxx
Diagnosed PCOS 1998 - 2 rounds of clomid no o'v
150mg Clomid ov miracle BFP- Sept 08, Eptopic Oct 08
IVF #1March 09 BFN- short protocol IVF #2 long protocol BFP- 24/8/09 My miracle boy born 8/5/10- 2 blasts in the freezer!
May '12 FET 14.5.12 BFN 22.5.12
Awaiting next af to start Ivf #3 natural BFP 9.8.12 (shock????) no heartbeat mmc at 10weeks 21.9.12 x
Another natural miracle BFP 21.11.12?! (8 weeks after my erpc) x another miracle boy born 14.7.13 x
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Amber » Thu Dec 27, 2012 11:08 am

Thanks Sazwell - New Year and a new start, let's put all the negative stuff behind us, learn from it and make a new start.
Diagnosed March 09
Lap & Dye Aug 09
6 x Clomid 50mg Ov BFN - 24-26 days
1 x clomid 100mg over stimulated
Cyclogest
IVF 1st round - 2 blasts BFN
Letting thing happen naturally
BFP @ 11 wks - Nov 12 mmc 12 wks
BFP @ 8 wks - 21/05/14 EDD 31/12/14
DD born 03/01/15
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby debs29 » Thu Dec 27, 2012 5:38 pm

Hi Sazwell and Amber - and anyone else reading this post - I love this thread already - that is exactly how I feel - that I need to look forward!

I have started my healthy lifestyle today with exercise and healthy low GI eating to lose 1 stone before next IVF. I am also going to make time for more 'me' time - I love to knit so more of that and baking!!!

I hope we all end up this time next year with a healthy pregnancy!

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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Amber » Thu Dec 27, 2012 6:08 pm

Great to see you have made a good start Debbie. We have to stay positive all through January too!
Diagnosed March 09
Lap & Dye Aug 09
6 x Clomid 50mg Ov BFN - 24-26 days
1 x clomid 100mg over stimulated
Cyclogest
IVF 1st round - 2 blasts BFN
Letting thing happen naturally
BFP @ 11 wks - Nov 12 mmc 12 wks
BFP @ 8 wks - 21/05/14 EDD 31/12/14
DD born 03/01/15
Amber
 
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Sazwell » Thu Dec 27, 2012 9:14 pm

That's it positivity girls... Look forward not back but we'll never forget!!! Xxx
Diagnosed PCOS 1998 - 2 rounds of clomid no o'v
150mg Clomid ov miracle BFP- Sept 08, Eptopic Oct 08
IVF #1March 09 BFN- short protocol IVF #2 long protocol BFP- 24/8/09 My miracle boy born 8/5/10- 2 blasts in the freezer!
May '12 FET 14.5.12 BFN 22.5.12
Awaiting next af to start Ivf #3 natural BFP 9.8.12 (shock????) no heartbeat mmc at 10weeks 21.9.12 x
Another natural miracle BFP 21.11.12?! (8 weeks after my erpc) x another miracle boy born 14.7.13 x
Sazwell
 
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Location: Sheffield

Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby debs29 » Sat Dec 29, 2012 3:39 am

Hi all,

Still going strong with the healthy eating and enjoying being able to exercise after my nightmare 6 weeks of OHSS and MC - I am finally feeling healthy again. Was going to ask - have seen mixed reviews about what is best for PCOS and eating - have come across issues with dairy - do you know anything about this? I am following weight watchers with low GI principles as it helps with my portion sizes etc but not sure how much dairy I should be eating. Any other tips greatly appreciated now I am in the mindset!

Sazwell - I like that you have said never forget but look forward - that is exactly how I cope. I bought a 'memorial' bracelet - my hospital gave me MC leaflets and one thing they advised was some sort of memory - a plant or something. I opted on a bracelet so that I always remember baby 1 but it also helps when I want extra food that I have motivation there for baby 2!!!

I hope you are both OK and still looking forward too xx
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Amber » Sat Dec 29, 2012 5:02 am

What a good idea about the memorial item, I'll have to think of something.

With dairy, the main problem is if you have lactose intolerance. This tends to show up as stomach ache and diarrhea. A lot of the advice about avoiding dairy seems to come from the US where they give the cows extra growth hormones. Other studies (such as the Nurses study) have shown that low fat dairy can inhibit ovulation so if you eat dairy eat the full fat variety. I eat full fat yogurt every day and sometimes put real cream in my coffee too. Ovulation is regular for me now. The other thing is to avoid dairy with added sugar as it is the sugar that causes problems for those of us with PCOS. If you eat full fat yoghurt you will find it taste okay without sugars and sweetners because it is the lack of fat that makes it taste sour. Fat brings down the GI value and provides you with the fertilty nutrients such as vitamin A and CLA.

I am now getting back to my uni work and I think the miscarriage experience has actually helped me to understand one of my assignments. It is a psychological assessment of a women (fictional of course) who is avoiding going for a 12 week scan due to a fear of there being a problem with the baby. I can totally sympathise!
Diagnosed March 09
Lap & Dye Aug 09
6 x Clomid 50mg Ov BFN - 24-26 days
1 x clomid 100mg over stimulated
Cyclogest
IVF 1st round - 2 blasts BFN
Letting thing happen naturally
BFP @ 11 wks - Nov 12 mmc 12 wks
BFP @ 8 wks - 21/05/14 EDD 31/12/14
DD born 03/01/15
Amber
 
Posts: 1190
Joined: Sun Mar 29, 2009 7:21 pm
Location: Hertfordshire

Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby debs29 » Sat Dec 29, 2012 6:27 am

I am finding the memorial bracelet a huge comfort. I want to move on but I loved (and love my baby) even though it was tiny and everyone says I was only 7 weeks, my baby was a person to me and every waking thought surrounded my baby. I also feel like my life has changed and I actually still feel like a mum, so I wanted something just for me that signified this. The bracelet for me was ideal - I wanted something that could be with me all the time and that is personal - so nobody but close friends and family know the significance. The leaflet we were given was written by people who go through miscarriage- they listed a few things, plant a tree or flowers, have a place to go in a garden of remembrance, some suggested writing a poem or letter, there is also a website where you can leave a message. I think it is a very personal thing and you will know what is right for you.

Thanks for the dairy advice - which brands of yoghurt do you eat? I have eaten low fat everything for so long that I don't even know what full fat yoghurt is!!!

It may be that your assignment is actually cathartic and helps you deal with some of your feelings, especially in the future when we fall pregnant again (it will happen!) and we have dreaded scans again!!!

Also without being too personal - are you what they call a slim PCOSer? I just ask as I've always struggled with my weight and I'm always on look out for advice! I feel very guilty as my PCOS symptoms had been very slight when I was undergoing IVF and pregnant but as the pregnancy developed my excess hair was coming in thicker and faster and then I miscarried. I'm just hoping that diet and eating the correct things can help as I'm so worried that the hormones that led to MC were the same ones related to excess hair. My acne has now started up again since MC. I want to sort out all I can before IVF #2. Sorry to be a pain with all these Q's but you seem so well researched into diet and PCOS! GPs and even fertility specialists explain nothing!
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby kate s » Sat Dec 29, 2012 6:52 am

I just wanted to say that my wish for 2013 is that all those ladies struggling to conceive and those struggling to come to terms with mc get their little miracles. I count myself very, very lucky that after suffering a loss in 2011 I fell again quite quickly and now have all that I want in the shape of a gorgeous 4 month old little girl :D Keep the faith my lovelies and I wish with all my heart you get to experience the joy I have had this year. Much love to you all. Kate xx
Me - 36 OH - 29
Diagnosed PCOS 2007
ttc Jan 2010
Began weight loss 19th June 2010
SA Jan 2011 good
Lost 7 stone by December 2011
Natural BFP 26/7/11 mc 10 weeks 4 days
Natural BFP 16/12/11 please stick this time
Megan Ella born 26/08/12
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Amber » Sat Dec 29, 2012 6:59 am

Hi Debbie

It sounds like your hospital has really put a lot of thought into the emotional side of miscarriage, lets hope other hospitals take on this approach. Do you have the website address?

I actually make my own yoghurt these days but sometimes I will eat the Yeovalley (green tub), Total greek yoghurt or Woodlands sheep yoghurt. I did go off the later when pregnant but it now tastes nice again.

I suppose I am a slim PCOSer, but not a skinny PCOSer, however if I eat the wrong foods I can gain weight very easily and have made this mistake in the past. I used to be slimmer before I went through rounds of Provera and clomid in which the hormone changes and stress led to some weight gain. Although it would be nice to get back to what I was, I daren't start 'dieting' because ovulation just stops for me when I do that. I have found that by eating a Paleo template style diet my weight stays the same and I don't have to worry about what I eat because my body tells me when I am hungry and when I have had enough. It is much less stressful this way. The thing is I stick to natural foods and don't eat processed foods. I found that wheat and gluten was the cause of my IBS and now that I have given it up I now longer have stomach issues. I moderate my carb intake by avoiding grains and sugar (neither has any significant nutrient value and I can get plenty of fibre from eating lots of vegetables). I have been lucky in that I have never had a problem with facial hair but I do get problems with acne. Over the summer it really cleared up as I got out in the sun lots, really got my stress levels down and took some zinc supplements. Unfortunately my miscarriage led to some of the spots coming back again, with it being particularly bad when AF last showed up. It's improving a bit now and hopefully when the days get a bit lighter it will clear again.

I know what you mean about GPs and fertility specialists. If they have never experienced PCOS and research into PCOS is fairly recent it is not suprising they don't know that much. Plus most of the fertility specialists seem to be men so they have no experience of being a woman and knowing what it feels like to experience period pain, ovulation etc. They don't realise that women can be in tune with their bodies and the reproductive system doesn't follow the text book all the time. It is this frustration that has led me to doing my own research and challenging the conventional wisdom around PCOS and all it's symptoms. If what they tell you to do doesn't work then you have to question if the information they give you is correct. It isn't always about lack of adherence to medical instructions, sometimes those instructions just don't work.
Diagnosed March 09
Lap & Dye Aug 09
6 x Clomid 50mg Ov BFN - 24-26 days
1 x clomid 100mg over stimulated
Cyclogest
IVF 1st round - 2 blasts BFN
Letting thing happen naturally
BFP @ 11 wks - Nov 12 mmc 12 wks
BFP @ 8 wks - 21/05/14 EDD 31/12/14
DD born 03/01/15
Amber
 
Posts: 1190
Joined: Sun Mar 29, 2009 7:21 pm
Location: Hertfordshire

Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Sazwell » Sat Dec 29, 2012 7:58 am

Hi everyone x

Kate thank you for your kind words honey and glad you finally got your miracle!! Xxx

Amber it sounds like keeping busy with uni work is good especially as Debbie says it might help!! Our diets are so important to our symptoms and it's so great your diet is so good! I really struggle with my weight and I put on weight so easily I really must get on top of it Xmas is a nightmare! Xxx

Debbie I have a necklace which got as a memory of my loss and also did a little memory box with couple of scans I had and my hpt (I know I'm weird) it's so hard and although I am pregnant again with a second natural miracle (conceived my ds on the second fresh cycle of Ivf) it still hurts every day but as I've already said I'm trying to look forward but I will definately never forget!!! I'm a fat pcos'er lol.. Well my Bmi is around 35!! I normally cut down on my carbs which helps with my weight loss and I need to exercise.. I have bad facial hair, weight problem, don't ovulate (although went on metformin and feel that enabled me to ov along with loosing a bit of weight?? Well that's what I think??). Debbie it's good that you have moved over to Ivf 2013 the ladies on there are amazing and I still go on there all the time they are so supportive and lovely!! It will be a great help for you xxx

I really hope this lo stays put and we all get our little bundles in 2013!!!
Diagnosed PCOS 1998 - 2 rounds of clomid no o'v
150mg Clomid ov miracle BFP- Sept 08, Eptopic Oct 08
IVF #1March 09 BFN- short protocol IVF #2 long protocol BFP- 24/8/09 My miracle boy born 8/5/10- 2 blasts in the freezer!
May '12 FET 14.5.12 BFN 22.5.12
Awaiting next af to start Ivf #3 natural BFP 9.8.12 (shock????) no heartbeat mmc at 10weeks 21.9.12 x
Another natural miracle BFP 21.11.12?! (8 weeks after my erpc) x another miracle boy born 14.7.13 x
Sazwell
 
Posts: 1741
Joined: Wed Dec 03, 2008 8:45 pm
Location: Sheffield

Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby debs29 » Sat Dec 29, 2012 1:52 pm

Kate- thank you for your lovely wishes and congratulations on the birth of your DD. It is great for me to hear of someone suffering a loss and then getting there!!

Amber - you are so disciplined in your diet - I am such an emotional eater, although now I have a goal and reason to lose weight I have been able to stick to things much easier - even trying to eat fish which I am not keen on! I will try some of those yoghurts! The leaflets I was given were published by miscarriage association - here is the web address http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/ My hospital were excellent. When we found out we had lost our baby the ward phoned our IVF specialists and they came down to speak to us and offer condolences and to assure us that this didn't mean we'd never have a baby. The ward on the day of MC were very supportive but business like - I was hysterical about having to go to the toilet etc so they were just the right balance between being firm and getting me through it and being understanding. After it was all over they totally changed and started to use the word baby again and were really understanding about our loss. They gave us leaflets and told us about a memorial service that they hold every 3 months that we could attend. They also said that we could phone whenever we liked and asked if we would like to come back and visit any midwives etc. Considering the bad press there had been a few days before about how MC were treated we couldn't have been in better hands. I think a lot of places could learn from the midwives on that ward!

Sazwell- congratulations on your pregnancy - again your story inspires me. Negative thoughts like the fact I'm big, have acne and excess hair causing me never to be able to carry a baby were creeping in and its great to see that PCOSers of all symptoms can successfully have babies! Hopefully sooner rather than later! I used to message on clomid and IUI boards but I found it hard as I found myself thinking about TTC all the time which was stressing me out. However, with the MC I need to look forward so speaking to similar people and sharing experiences will help me think about baby 2. I have also found the pregnancy loss board a saviour. Am not sure I could have got to where I am without you all.

May I ask - how did your OHs take you MC. My fiance is finding it very hard and unlike us he has nobody to turn to. He also lost his mum in September - I am worried about him - he is looking tired and down. I went out shopping yesterday and when I came back he was so down and said he just feels really sad all the time. Any advice?

Debbiex
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Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Sazwell » Sat Dec 29, 2012 2:49 pm

Debbie you will definately get there and I'm a very good example it CAN & WILL happen!!
My DH especially in '08 when we had our first loss he found it very difficult and was trying to be strong for us both. This time he was a bit better as I have always told him to talk to me as it just gets worse.. It is hard for them because it's all about us and it's us that have been through it, but it's as hard for them. Talk to him ask how he's feeling? Tell him how you feel.. I'm a big believer in a problem shared is a problem halved!!! Hope this helps?!?
We are all here for you and each other xxxxxxx
Diagnosed PCOS 1998 - 2 rounds of clomid no o'v
150mg Clomid ov miracle BFP- Sept 08, Eptopic Oct 08
IVF #1March 09 BFN- short protocol IVF #2 long protocol BFP- 24/8/09 My miracle boy born 8/5/10- 2 blasts in the freezer!
May '12 FET 14.5.12 BFN 22.5.12
Awaiting next af to start Ivf #3 natural BFP 9.8.12 (shock????) no heartbeat mmc at 10weeks 21.9.12 x
Another natural miracle BFP 21.11.12?! (8 weeks after my erpc) x another miracle boy born 14.7.13 x
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Location: Sheffield

Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby Amber » Sat Dec 29, 2012 4:16 pm

Thanks for the link Debbie, I will take a look. At least you recognise that you are eating emotionally. You can therefore work on distracting activities. Sugary foods are mildly addictive and can give you that feeling of wellbeing when stressed or upset which is why people tend to crave sweet foods. A hug can release the same chemicals in the body!

Men are terrible about talking about their emotions, I kept on telling my DH to talk to people about it but he said he just didn't want to talk about it. He then came home from work with a migraine which affected his eye sight! I still don't know if he has confided in anybody else but he seems to be more relaxed now. Debbie, does your OH have a good friend or a colleague he can talk to? When you do talk to people it is amazing how many people know someone else who have experienced miscarriage or have been through it themselves. Knowing that it has happened to other people helps you to feel less alone. The British culture is terrible about talking about emotional issues!
Diagnosed March 09
Lap & Dye Aug 09
6 x Clomid 50mg Ov BFN - 24-26 days
1 x clomid 100mg over stimulated
Cyclogest
IVF 1st round - 2 blasts BFN
Letting thing happen naturally
BFP @ 11 wks - Nov 12 mmc 12 wks
BFP @ 8 wks - 21/05/14 EDD 31/12/14
DD born 03/01/15
Amber
 
Posts: 1190
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Location: Hertfordshire

Re: To a better year.. 2013!!!

Postby debs29 » Sat Dec 29, 2012 9:23 pm

Hi Amber - I will definitely need more hugging! I also struggle with eating out or even eating at others houses where I can't control my meals etc. Also being in a rush beause then I rely on processed foods and this is something I am trying to avoid now.

He does have friends etc but chooses not to. When he emailed one friend the friend replied and said they had just experienced the same thing and they met up and didn't even talk about it!!!! I will keep at him though!

Can I ask - I am 2 weeks and a day past my MC and I am still bleeding sometimes with big clots - is this normal? My clinic said clots should stop after 4 days. What do you think?
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