Trying again after a loss

A safe haven for you to discuss losing a pregnancy and recurrent miscarriage

Moderators: Northfifer, Sammi, Hols969, DawnyB, purplestar, loachy, Mrs Wilko, Lutzomyia, thebuzz

Postby Doodles » Tue Apr 12, 2011 11:55 am

Recently had my first miscarriage at 12 weeks. We are focussed on the fact that now we know I can actually conceive...but the fear for me is that my pcos screwed hormones can't sustain a pregnancy.
I know I can't get any further medical help until after 3 miscarriages, but wondered if any of you have any thoughts on what I can do myself to improve things.
Have lost 2 stone 8 already but BMI still 33ish, I know that is my first thing to do, lose more (however it's really hard, I am very muscular and docs don't seem to take that into account)
Any other suggestions?
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Joined: Fri Aug 28, 2009 12:26 pm

Postby Kasha » Tue Apr 12, 2011 1:05 pm

Hi doodles. Sorry for your loss.
I can't ofer any advice really, except to say that i was told that having pcos was most liely not a contributing factor to the miscarriage i had last year, and that it was just one of those things.
The best thing i can suggest is that you are in as good a state of health as you can get before conceiving again.if it helps you, i did take evening primrose oil for a couple of cycles as well. Don't know if it helped but it did make me feel like i was doing something positive.

Good luck x

BFP - 7/10/10, sadly miscarried at 6 weeks 15/10/10

BFP - 18/11/10


BFP 07/12

Raindrops 'n Roses
Posts: 4547
Joined: Tue Aug 30, 2005 4:48 pm

Postby diamond water » Sun Jun 05, 2011 11:59 am

Iam really sorry to hear all of your stories. I too past everything and took my little baby (iwas 12weeks) to hosp with me. As you say at least u know something has happened but it was heartbreaking to see little fingers and toes. :cry:

I have found all your stories so sad. Quite a few made me cry. This was my first natural preg (I had alittle girl after first ivf in oct o8) and as you say once you get past 12 weeks u think ur safe. I had a scan at 8weeks and heartbeat was strong but new on fri last week that something wasn't right. I feel am getting stronger each day but still shed a little tear. I don't know how u ladies have managed to deal with losing a baby further on! I really admire ur strengh. I just want tokeep strong and keep telling myself it wasn't my fault. hugs to all xxx
diamond water
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Joined: Fri Jun 03, 2011 7:13 pm
Location: Northern Ireland

Postby hope07 » Sat Jun 18, 2011 6:56 pm

Diamond- sending big hugs huni- X
7 -1st Trimester M/C's- TTC since Oct 05

Mummy to two beautiful children
1 DD- Natural BFP
Posts: 3788
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2007 2:02 pm

Postby daisypops » Sun Sep 04, 2011 5:25 pm

I am so sorry to read of your losses (((hugs))). I am a serial stalker of the verity forum but felt like now was the right time to share my story:

I was diagnosed with PCOS after suffering from an ectopic pregnancy in Nov 2007. After a year followed with no AF (it had been regular before the Ectopic but this was down to being on the pill) and then another year of tests (lap and dye, boyfriends SA etc etc) I started on clomid. The clomid worked and on round no. 3 in March 2010 I had suspected that I was PG but after testing for over a week and getting BFN's I booked a doctors appt. I started to bleed before the appt but went along anyway, dr confirmed I was PG but tbh I didnt hold out much hope. After further blood tests, the early pregnancy unit confirmed that I was no longer PG. 2 days later I had the same as what others describe as a mini labour and passed the sac - I was 5 weeks.

Since then and after 12 rounds of clomid in total we were referred for IVF which amazingly worked first time and it was twins! I got a BFP on 16th April 11 and all progressed well at 6, 8, 12 and 20 week scans - we were so so happy and only after 20 weeks allowed ourselves to start buying things. Then at 21+4 I noticed I had a lot of discharge during the day which at night had a red streak of blood in it (sorry tmi!) I phoned and spoke to a midwife at the labour ward and was advised that it was probably a urine infection and to go to dr's the next day. In the morning the bleeding was heavier and I was getting tightening pains across my belly. We went in to the labour ward and after being examined was told that I was dilating and twin 1's membranes were visible in my cervix. :cry:

The dr's did evrything they could and tried to put in a stitch but by this time I was fully dilated and an even an attempt to drain some fluid from around the babies did not work as there was just too much pressure. Labour started that night but then stopped and we held some hope that everything might be ok. After 9 days in my own room on the labour ward I started getting pains again and our tiny twin boys Alex and Ollie were born on the 25th and 26th August weighing just 1lb and 1lb 2oz at 22+6. They were so beautiful and perfect but just too small to surive. :cry:

So now feeling so empty in every sense of the word we are back to square one and I have never felt so sad in my life. At the moment it feels like it will never go away but some of your touching stories show me that with time it will get easier.

You are so inspirational ladies and when I am feeling really down I always check on here to read some stories of hope xxx
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Postby Kasha » Sun Sep 04, 2011 6:18 pm

I can't offer any advice but couldn't read and run. I am so sorry for your loss. What a devastating thing to happen. There are lots of ladies here with late miscarriages so i'm sure someone can offer you more supportive words than i can.
Take good care of yourself and your oh xxx

BFP - 7/10/10, sadly miscarried at 6 weeks 15/10/10

BFP - 18/11/10


BFP 07/12

Raindrops 'n Roses
Posts: 4547
Joined: Tue Aug 30, 2005 4:48 pm

Postby looey82 » Sun Sep 04, 2011 9:48 pm

Gosh Daisypops- I'm so so sorry. That's just so sad and unfair.

I can really relate to your experience as I also have suffered an early mc (concieved on clomid) and then a late miscarriage at 19 weeks. We also were so very happy and began to relax at about 16 weeks through the pregnancy. We've now had 12 rounds of clomid and no joy yet.
All I can say is that I was totally and utterly devastated. I was so very unhappy for at least a year and got to the point where I felt at times like it wasn't worth bring alive. It's now been 17 months since our loss and things do get better. I couldn't possibly have imagined it ever being without being pregnant again- I don't think I would have believed anyone if they said but I promise that it does.
Things are obviously still difficult and I am about to start IUI before moving to IVF and the pain is there but it doesn't comsume every single day like it once did.
I was offered counselling at my clinic and although a bit reluctant, went along. It turned out to be very helpful and I believe one of the most healing things to do. I went for about 8 months so it took a while but it helped to talk things through.
It's such early days for you at the moment and my heart breaks for you as I remember the enormity of having to come to terms with what you have lost. The frustration, disappointment and sadness is overwhelming.
The only advice I can give is to give yourself lots of time and allow yourself to feel exactly how you want to . I felt (and still do) such jealousy and anger at other pregnant people and had to keep my distance. I spent the majority of my spare time under a duvet on the sofa and life just passed me by. For me it got worse before it got better.
I'm not trying to worry you but just to give you warning and also to see that as black as things were back then I have managed to find the strength to carry on.
Have loads of hugs from you partner and be kind to yourself. This wasn't your fault.
Take care and if you want to just type it all out in detail- what happened and how you feel- I'm happy to listen. I found it really helped to write it all down. Lots of love to you . xxx
TTC Mar 08
Clomid#1 May 09-BFP- MMC at 9+2wks
Natural BFP- Dec 09! Lost baby girl at 18+5 wks due to pPROM
12 clomid cycles & 2 x FSH injections with IUI- BFNs
IVF#1- 25 eggs, 8 fertilised, 1 back + 4 frosties!
IVF BFP- Clexane & prog injections, low dose steroids & aspirin
Aug 12- DS born at 27+5wks after 10 weeks of problems
TTC#2 Nov 13
Mar 14- FET 1 embryo transfered- BFP- early MC
IVF DD born at 34+4wks Apr 2015
Posts: 943
Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2009 10:29 pm
Location: West Yorkshire

Postby daisypops » Tue Sep 06, 2011 3:29 pm

Thanks for your replies x

Looey82 very sorry that we have such similar stories, it is reassuring to read that things got better for you. Think at the moment for me its just about taking things one day at a time and taking a break before thinking about starting ttc again.

Good luck with your IUI - really hope its good news for you.

TTC since Aug 07
Nov 07 - Ectopic pregnancy
Diagnosed PCOS
Mar 10 - Clomid cycle 3 BFP! - m/c at 5 weeks
Mar 11 - IVF cycle 1 BFP! - lost our beautiful twin boys at 22+6 on 25th/26th Aug 11
Dec 11 - Surprise natural BFP! EDD 13 Aug 12
Posts: 51
Joined: Sun Sep 04, 2011 4:50 pm

Re: Trying again after a loss

Postby crazyDiane » Thu Jul 30, 2015 9:02 pm

I am really sorry of you and hope you will be ok after this loss.
I have pcos, I am taking now Inofem, which I hope, will help me to get pregnant after many tries ":)
Posts: 42
Joined: Fri Jun 12, 2015 12:57 pm

Re: Trying again after a loss

Postby SummerJessica » Tue Jan 12, 2016 1:52 pm

Well I'm back on this board unfortunately as I just suffered my second miscarriage post PCOS diagnosis. It's hard to explain how I feel as sometimes I feel almost normal and other times I break down at the slightest thing. I am still bleeding from the second one but am hopeful it will stop this week as I seem to have passed part of the sac this afternoon.

Last time I needed a break and it was 18 months before I fell pregnant again, this time in want to start asap as I am now 35.

I have one beautiful boy who is 4 and my pregnancy with him was wonderful, I had a few aches and pains in the latter stages but no problems.

My concern this time is last pregnancy I OVed CD23 and the time before that was CD40 (both times I conceived and both times miscarried). With my son I OVed CD17 and we were BDing more regularly whereas both recent times we only BDed on day of OV and hadn't for around 1 week prior so am concerned not only that my egg wasnt in good condition but also the sperm that made it also wasn't great. Both miscarriages have been around the 5-6 week mark although this one did seem to be progressing as my CB digital had went up in weeks and my symptoms were great. So I dont know what happened.

I am of course terrified to try again and for this to happen once more. I kind of thought having had one healthy pregnancy to term it would be easier next time but now I'm so worried. My husband only wants to try one more time as he says I can't keep going through this physically and emotionally and to be honest I'm not sure I can either. I know I need to start trying asap as every month I didn't try last year was a constant reminder I wasn't pregnant and no further forward. So I am currently back on Metformin and have bought pre-conception vitamins for both me and hubby. I have asked about cyclogest next time but they said there is no evidence to suggest that this would help :( I am also going to be on Clexane from the beginning (this time they started me 2 days before I miscarried). I have to be on Clexane as I suffered a DVT in 2013 after a run of chest infections so I was advised that any further pregnancy I would need to be on this.

So my HCG results should be down to 0 by the end of the week and once they are how long do I have to wait before I start ttc again? I have to take Clomid to OV at all but I am prepared to hold off a month to see if I do get a bleed naturally but I doubt it. I do have Norethisterone to induce one but I don't think I will get an appointment with my consultant before its ready to start again.

Does anyone have any further success stories after 2 mc in a row?
My Ovulation Chart

Diagnosed PCOS 2001
2 m/c 2001
No cycles
Clomid 100mg 29/06/10 - OV CD17 prog 43 - BFP 30 July 2010
Beautiful baby boy born 26/03/11
TTC No 2 since 06/11 no OV
Clomid 100mg 27/01/14 -OV CD40 prog 35 - BFP MC 5.1
Clomid 150mg 03/06/14 - No OV
Clomid 150mg CD5-9 22/07/14 - OV CD21 prog 28
OD 27/07/15
Clomid 100mg 27/11/15 BFP - MC 5.4 weeks
Clomid 100mg July 2016 BFP Please be my sticky bean!
Posts: 1838
Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2008 3:31 pm

Re: Trying again after a loss

Postby swingblue » Mon Apr 18, 2016 11:57 am

i thought i would post this: ht*p://
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Joined: Wed Feb 03, 2016 1:26 pm


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