Can things at work get any worse!

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Can things at work get any worse!

Postby youlemming » Wed Feb 01, 2012 9:35 pm

Hi just need to get thigns out there really and have limited options due to the sensitive nature of what's going on.

Been a really stressfull time at work anyway with a number of issues and large projects luming but now the pressure has really increased and things have turned more personal.

One of the guys that works for me called in with personal issues on Monday and has now been reported missing!

Obviously trying to keep things quiet at work but I don't know how long that will last for as we are having to spread the work load around already as it's things that can be left for more than a few days.

Feel terrible as I didn't pick up that there were any issues and keep thinking back trying to find a hint of something.
Talking to his wife it's all come as a complete shock and I can't imagine what his family are going through.

Just don't know what I can do :?
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Postby Hols969 » Thu Feb 02, 2012 10:18 am

People can put on a front so there may have been no indication of things not being quite as they seem. Often depressed people can appear very outgoing and it is just a mask.

I think a lot of people are really worried financially so it could be that, hopefully he has a bit of space to himself, works his head out, and comes back soon. Poor wife tho, if Jim did that to me I think even tho I would be worried I would be pretty darn cross that he didnt talk to me so think it will be a real mix of emotions.

I would just say to people he is sick as it would be an awful stigma if people did know he had gone awol.
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Postby youlemming » Thu Feb 02, 2012 8:47 pm

We have had a couple of people take time off over the past yr due to stress and they were the most unlikely just taking things at face value.

I really don't think he will be coming back or at least not back to work if he does get in contact with anyone.
It's like he has just cut ties with everything that could be traced and disappeared!

If we can we will hold the line that he is out possible long term sick then as time goes on that he decided not to return to work and never let on what has actually happened.

I've had a constant sick feeling in my stomach since yesterday and I know there isn't anything I could have done but still feel some responsibilty to his wife as I may be the last person he had contact with.
Finding it difficult to get on with things and not let it pray on my mind.

The others in my team are also starting to get worried and question more, when anyone is off ill there is still usually contact by email.

It's just something you never expect to have to deal with and there are no processes in place to follow.

Couldn't begin to imagine how I would cope if it was my OH :cry:
50mg Clomid May
50mg June = BFP!!!!!
Due 9th March 2010
Amelia 09/03/10 7lb 14oz
Dec BFP with No.2 - Girl due 31st July 2015
Phoebe 31/07/2015 8lb 2oz
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Postby Hols969 » Fri Feb 03, 2012 10:51 am

I dont think there is anything you could have done. He must have some sort of mental health problem to have gone AWOL. It has to be within himself to do something so even if you had an incling I still doubt you could have done anything.

I do feel sorry for the wife, in some ways it is very selfish to have done what he has done but it has got to be that his head isnt in the right place to have done it.

It is really sad tho that someone feels like this and unable to speak to anyone about it, but depression is a chemical imbalance and you dont necessarily think as your normal self (I remember it well!! but I always felt able to speak to my OH). Perhaps there were issues within the family rather than work ones as well.

Im sure you will just have a niggling at the back of your mind of 'what if' types but people show what they want others to see so try not to let it niggle too much.
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Postby Constance » Thu Feb 09, 2012 10:19 am

How is it going Youlemming - has he come back to his home/work, etc?
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Diagnosed PCOS Apr 2008
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M/C Jan 2012
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Postby youlemming » Thu Feb 09, 2012 3:16 pm

Hi, even though the police have made contact with him he hasn't returned or got into direct contact with anyone, just asked that they let his wife know he was ok, thats debatable concidering they found him sleeping rough quite a distance from home!
I am assuming he was making sence to them and didn't seem like he was acting irrantionally/unstable or they wouldn't have left him there.

Really not sure what is going to happen with it all, I just know in the mean time we are lookgin for a backfill as we can't cope being one person down for much longer especially as we were looking for a temp anyway to help spread the work load, now we need 2!

Got over thinking I should have known something was wrong, there is nothing I can do about it now.

Away for work next week so that leaves the department even more stretched and as it's half term there are 4 days were another is out as well, thats from a usual 7 to 4 people.
As there is not much I can do until he gets back in contact I have to concentrate on the business and make sure the others are coping as best they can, don't want the additional work load to have an impact on their health :roll:
50mg Clomid May
50mg June = BFP!!!!!
Due 9th March 2010
Amelia 09/03/10 7lb 14oz
Dec BFP with No.2 - Girl due 31st July 2015
Phoebe 31/07/2015 8lb 2oz
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Joined: Tue Nov 15, 2005 1:05 pm
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